Interview with Dr. Kait Rosiere

Dr. Kait Rosiere is a licensed clinical psychologist and a certified eating disorder specialist. Her blog is linked at the bottom.

This interview is focused on families/parents and how they can help a teenager with an eating disorder

Q:  

What are some early warning signs of an eating disorder that teenagers and their families may overlook?

A:

A shrinking personality. To a certain extent, it’s normal for teens to withdraw and spend less time with family. We fully expect the moodiness that comes with puberty and desire for independence. What tends to come with a budding eating disorder is a little different. As the disorder progresses, we tend to see a teen’s “glow” begin to fade. They’re hanging out with fewer friends, spending more time alone, hobbies are dwindling, and they lose passions. They may no longer enjoy the things they used to.  Anxiety might increase, and what used to be tolerable is now overwhelming. Then comes to food component. Depending on the disorder, it could look differently. It might be restrictive, cutting out certain food groups, trying to be “healthier” or push themselves a little harder at the gym. Avoidance of family meals or wearing baggy clothing to hide weight loss. It could include emotional or binge eating. Finding hidden food wrappers, eating a lot in shorter periods of time, or a pattern of disappearing to the bathroom after meals.

Q:

Many teenagers are afraid to tell their parents they’re struggling. What advice would you give to someone who wants help but doesn’t know how to talk about it with their parents?

A:

Reaching out to your parents can feel like an overwhelming step. The most important advice I can give? One hard conversation could lead to a lifetime of healing, and you deserve that. Sometimes it’s helpful to share your worries with them first. “I’ve really wanted to ask for help with something, but I’m worried how you might take it,” or “but it’s hard for me to share what’s going on.” If a conversation feels too daunting, writing a letter can be a helpful first step. It can be helpful to give some perspective to what’s going on inside. Share the changes you’ve noticed in yourself. Who were you before vs. who have you become? Or you can keep it as simple as “I’ve been having a hard time lately with (food, eating, or how I feel about my body) and I think I need help.”

Q:

 What roles can family members play when it comes to supporting someone with an eating disorder?

A:

A nonjudgmental, loving space can go a far way. Having curiosity for what your loved one is going through — instead of criticism — invites exploration and change instead of shame. Sometimes, it’s helpful for family members to take a more active role in recovery. That can look like a variety of different options:  offering support during meals, getting their own education on eating disorders, or attending support groups for parents and loved ones. Asking your loved one’s therapist for guidance is a great place to start.

Q:

How can parents and caregivers create a healthy environment around food, body image, and exercise at home?

A:

Parents and caregivers can promote a healthy relationship with food, body image, and exercise by modeling balanced behaviors and attitudes themselves. Focus on what bodies can do rather than how they look — function over appearance. Avoid labeling foods as “good” or “bad,” using them for reward or punishment, or restricting certain food groups. Encourage a variety of foods without pressure or guilt. Promote movement for enjoyment, health, and stress relief rather than weight control. Be mindful of negative comments about your own body or others’ bodies.

Q:

What is one misconception you have seen families/family members make when it comes to eating disorders, and what would you like them to understand instead?

A:

Eating disorders are not about willpower or choice, nor are they acts of defiance or manipulation. They are complex diseases that can be life threatening. Your teen may be sick and tired of struggling and simultaneously terrified to let it go. It’s helped manage overwhelming emotions. In some ways, the ED can feel like a not so healthy, but reliable friend that is always there when times get tough.

Read more about Dr. Rosiere and her blog here! She is currently accepting new clients.